Playing dead not only comes in handy when face to face with a bear, but also at important business meetings.
To me, it's always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, 'Hey, can you give me a hand,' you can say, 'Sorry, got these sacks.'
If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now.
Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.
I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.